A very talented designer with a very hard name… [http://files.neuroshima.org/ready7a.mp3] 😉

The Dice Tower recorded video called: Top 10 essential games every gamer should have.

Are you guys kidding us?! Do you realize what impact this video can have on our lives? Do you think our wives don’t use you tube?! Wake up!

You don’t have to be a prophet to see our wives watching it and then trashing our collection leaving us with 10 games!

’This all you need darling as I heard…’

I see those headlines: Her husband had 300+ games, but now he has only 10! She watched The Dice Tower video.

Guys, you need to record another video. As soon as possible. Here is a script:

Zee: hi folks. There’s been misunderstanding
Tom: a huge one
Sam: we want to apologize all wives
Zee: and gamers
Tom: our lates epizode was about essential 10 games to have in collection
Sam: meaning 'as a best start for our collection’
Zee: these 10 games are fundament
Tom: fundament not whole building.
Sam: beginning, not finish…

Save us before it is too late…

This Monday I played a game that was stuck on my shelf for some about three months. It was patiently waiting while I was working on Portal Games prototypes and had no time for playing for fun (how stupid it sounds, heh?!). Finally I said: 'I am sick of prototypes. I want to play a real game!’

So I played. It was a very strange experience. In my opinion this game is a box full of mistakes. Guys who designed it broke so many design rules that I basically just couldn’t believe it. Really.

#1: Cards
OK, I know, this might not be a general design rule. This is my personal taste. I believe that cards should be in hand or stay on the table. That’s it. Cards are not pawns. Cards are not counters. Cards are not good for moving them on the table, putting them one under the other and all that kind of stuff.

That is why I don’t play Summoner wars (do I see rocks incoming?), that is why I don’t play Innovation (more rocks?), that is why I don’t play Glory to Rome (please, stop it, guys!).

I say – keep your cards in hand or put them on the table and DON’T TOUCH IT. Keep them that way!

On Monday I had to move my cards, I had to put some cards on my cards, and some cards under my cards, and even some cards next to my cards and then I had to move all of my cards, except this one card that is unmovable…

You must be kidding, me…

#2: Keywords
You put keywords into games to underline some of the most important rules or traits. They are used mostly in CCG games. You might played with Skirmish in LotR CCG, Deadly in GoT or Hero in Invasion… You know them. Keywords.

If you put into your game two hundred and twenty four keywords these are no longer keywords. These are painwords.

What was the Frozen? Man, I don’t know. Can you check this Taunted again? And Elusive. And, ah, no, no, Fast I do remember. Fast was +1 movement. But in that case… What the hell is a Charge?!

Each card in this game has few keywords! And there is four or more pages in rulebook with list of all keywords in the game. Madness. Have you guys heard about making games player friendly? How you can explain the game to the new player? How you can start play the game without torture?

Flying. Natural. Regeneration. Burning…

#3: Downtime
I mean, lot’s of words have been said about making games fast, efficient, making turns or rounds as quick as possible. Every designer wants his game to work smooth and quick.

In this game player – in his turn – chooses 2 cards from his whole deck. He literally have 50 or so cards in hand and he chooses 2 of them.

I could not believe it is real. But it was.

#4: Conclusion
I could probably go on and talk about 9 or 6 tokens, short action and long action problems, huge grey board, and small cubes for mana points… There is lots of things here that are against all modern design rules.

I say it – if authors of this game came to me at the stage of prototype, I would kick their ass and I would show them door. There is no way I would publish this game.

The problem is, I would be wrong. Because Mage Wars is an amazing game.

I had great time this Monday. It turned out that I can stand moving cards. It turned out that I can learn all these bloody keywords. It turned out I can even get used to this sad grey board.

I can do this because even with breaking all those designing games rules, and even being extremely player unfriendly, Mage Wars in its roots is basically a pure fun.

That’s exactly what I expect from games. So here is my message to designers – Fuck design rules. Bring pure fun. Just as Mage Wars did this Monday.

We had a geek birthday. To be precise, three of them in one day. My Merry, and my friends: Tycjan and WC. Three geeks, three birthdays, one party. How cool is that?

And since we are all geeks, among the bottles of wine, there were also a geek presents and gifts.

What is a difference between present for gamer and present for geek? You, boardgames geeks know it, right?

Gamer gets boardgames.
Geek gets unique boardgames.

Unique stuff like print and play treasures that are unavailable in stores and you can’t have them unless you spend two nights printing, cutting, sticking…

Unique stuff like pre-production copy of Portal Games games that will be released for Essen 2013 and right now they are unavailable in stores and you can’t have them unless you have birthday and I am invited…

Yeah, geeks birthdays can be superfun.

***

For a past few years we spent summer vacation with other geeks. Our kids have fun together on playgrounds and swimming pools etc, while we have great time playing boardgames. One or two weeks of playing card games (on beach) and big boardgames (in rooms). No time pressure, no going to work in the morning, you can put Twilight Imperium on the table and feel no pressure. You have two weeks ahead!

Few weeks ago I discovered however that there is a difference between gamer’s vacations and geek’s vacations. And what is worst, I discovered that I may be in the gamer category. You know, it seems I am not geeky enough! I, Ignacy Trzewiczek were spending gamers, not geeky vacations! They must be kidding me…

So what’s the difference?

Gamers go with their friends to play boardgames on vacations.
Geeks go further…

I discovered website http://boardgametravel.com/ where you can sign up for a geek vacation. What they offer? Library of 400 games available for you. Tournaments. Prototypes sessions. And special guests, just in case it was not geeky enough yet – you will spend summer vacations with Touko Tahkokallio (author of Eclipse boardgame) and Rahdo (from Rahdo Runs Through).

Yeah, geeks vacations can be superfun.

***

New Year Eve! The crazy night! All people around world dance and drink, and we geeks can play boardgames! I spent great nights running boardgames marathon for the past few years. We were playing as many party games as possible. Superfun, but…

But my Merry said this is enough. She wants to dance.

So, my friends, I am in trouble. I have six months to explain her that dancing in the New Years Eve will ruin her geek’s reputation.

She must understand – in the true geeks world dancing is not acceptable!

When I first heard about the fact that Avalon is different from The Resistance with Merlin character I shrugged and sighed in resignation. 'Merlin, novelity my ass’, I thought. Then came the time to analyze the rules and the first signs of rebellion against the new rule. 'What a nonsense!’, I complained. „Good characters are playing the game, analyze, trying to figure out who is Mordred servant, and then bam!, they kill Merlin, the end, good guys lost!’

Yeah. I didn’t like the rule. Before we move on – short explanation of the rules.

During a game of Avalon players are divided into two teams, Arthur’s loyal knights and traitors serving Mordred. The identity of the players is a secret, each of the players only know their own identity, the rest you have to guess during game.

Merlin is a special character. A player who is Merlin knows the identity of the traitors. Right from the beginning he knows exactly who are the ones who serve Mordred… Huge advantage for good guys, so there is a balancing mechanism – at the end of the game traitors have the right to attack Merlin. If they guess who among the good guys is Merlin, they kill him, Merlin dies, and evil triumphs…

I didn’t like it at all. Stupid final of the game. But even that I tried to play. And soon after it turned out that I am a complaining idiot.

What we know at the beginning? We all realize that Merlin should not play with open headgear. If bad guys figure out his identity, they will kill him at the end of the game and they will win. Merlin should play subtly and not attract attention.

Well, unless he plays va banque. He plays 'sheriff style’ and he is hoping that the bad guys will think that no Merlin is so stupid to play so openly! They will think he is just pretending being Merlin and that someone else is Merlin.

Well, unless one of the good guys will try to get attention of bad guys and pretend to play carelessly, pretend to unintentionally reveal himself… Yeah, then bad guys will kill him and that is how Merlin is saved!

Unless, a player who is Merlin will play like a moron to lower attention of bad guys. He will do bad decisions and will judge wrong people during whole game just to – at the key moment of the game – accidentally save good guys?

Or maybe…

It turned out that in practice the rule of Merlin works superbly good and give you extra room for a bluff, to set traps in the traps, it gives a lot of new emotions.

And me… well … What can I say… I have to apologize Don Eskridge. I apologize that I have lost my faith in his talent and that I have complained about the game before I even played it.

Mr. Eskridge, I’m a jerk.