11 AM, according to the plan I’m having a short break for a cup of delicious coffee while working on a short text about the new edition of Witchcraft. A couple of completely new versions of the game lay in front of me on the table, next there are two secret projects for 2015, opposite them new add-ons for both Theseus and Hex.

I receive an email. I read it and all of a sudden the coffee is no longer delicious.

Today won’t be about Witchcraft.

Some time ago Ignacy wrote how you should always finish your game projects as soon as possible because even a small delay might cause it to be too late. Someone will do it before you. He or she will design an almost identical game and show it to the world first. All you can do then is throw your project into the trash.

It’s not hard to become paranoid in this business. We constantly have these threats hanging above our heads: “move it man or it will be too late!”.

Such was the email I got from Ignacy.

Subject: „”
Content: „I think someone already came up with your game.” And a link.

As you can imagine I felt my heart jumping somewhere around my throat.

Click. I start reading.

Suddenly the coffee was no longer delicious.

I followed the link that lead to a description of a co-operational sf horror, “Aliens” themed game that is being developed. Just what I’ve been working on for the last few months. Maybe it’s just a coincidence of theme and genre? Maybe Ignacy made a mistake? I read on…

The game begins in medias res, oops. Each player takes control of one of the crew members, has his hidden goal that is or isn’t the same as the ones possessed by others. The crew searches the ship, repairs the damage, avoids encounters with aliens. Instead of aliens there are markers indicating that something might be ‘over there!’– movement in the darkness, murmurs. The monsters have their own card and development and breeding mechanics. In the game we’ve got escape pods, self destruction systems, we can barricade the door, research alien remains, secure samples, use special ventilation shafts, negotiate with other players. And so on…

Oh well. I read till the end. EVERTHING is the same.

First thought: someone really did design my game. Not a very pleasant feeling.

Then a moment of clarity. Alright, let’s have another look at this description. Carefully, sentence after sentence, board game photos and then work-in-progress game components.

The longer I looked into it the more differences I spotted. But my feelings were still mixed.

Not long ago I wrote about how I design games that I would like to play myself. Only because nobody else designed them. So if somebody is designing my dream game why do I have this unpleasant feeling? Why do I keep looking for differences and similarities with a growing nervousness? And inside I pray that this other game would be totally different than mine?

Have I lied in the earlier entry?

Well, no. I didn’t. There is a difference when you find your dream game BEFORE you spend half a year of hard work and AFTER you do it, am I right? I sacrificed a huge amount of my time and energy on this game. I honestly pray that these two games will be totally different.

I know that maybe all those similar or identical elements are just a small part of both of these games and the thing that is most important might still be different. I am aware how small a part of my game all these similarities are those, that have turned my coffee into a mug of undrinkable mud. These are just a dozen or so pieces in a box that will contain more than a hundred.

Maybe there is additional work ahead of me to change my game in many places. Maybe I will have to throw out a bigger part of the mechanics as I will be the second in line. Tough luck, I’m ready. I still have some time for this and I plan to finish this project until 2015.

Finally I look at the pile of my game materials, on the board, the tokens, the notes and the cards. I look on the codex of the project, describing the most important assumptions to be put to life. This is the essence of the game. This codex is the quintessence of the character of the gameplay. If the games were to be identical they would also have to have identical foundations, identical proportions of adventure and tactics, simplicity and complexity, horror and heroism – and so on. The author would have to have the same expectations from his game as I have from mine. If this would be the case than I have a clone, I can relax and throw all my work to trash. From then on I would buy only this guy’s games.

One thing remains. Do I still remember why I started to make this game in the first place?

Why? Because I love this theme. Claustrophobic sf horror – my favorite genre since… forever. Instead of ripping through hordes of aliens – you sneak through dark corridors, check each spot of the spaceship with fear hanging in the air, listen to every screech of the metal floor. You check out the monitoring. You research samples. You don’t trust your fellow crewman. It’s a small territory with limited resources, unknown danger and no hope for escape.

On my list of all time favorite movies there are two hundred claustrophobic sf horrors.

So since someone else is designing a game in a similar mood – can I not see this person as a soulmate? He has similar taste and views on games. All I can do is to keep my fingers crossed for his game and as soon as it’s out, buy it because it seems that it’s what I’ve always wanted to play!

What is left for me alone is to make a completely different game – however I already know the games will share quite a few mechanisms – it has to be the best adventure, claustrophobic sf horror game that anyone can imagine.

Then all that I will have left to do is to finish Space Scream – role-playing game in an almost identical setting.

Half an hour passed. My morning coffee time is over and so are my doubts and temporary confusion. I’m going back to work because the goal is clear.

[guest post by Michał Oracz]

Did you guys ever stole something from yourself? I did.

And so last year I insolently stole my own idea.

What can I say in my defense?

First of all it was an accident. I didn’t realize…

Yeah, so I sound like a typical thief.

Secondly, in game designing business stealing ideas is no big deal or so I heard. It’s not like MP3s or something, anybody can take whatever they want. So I didn’t press charges and you are probably wondering what’s all the fuss about?
Third of all, it’s not all black and white since I changed a few things and…

Wait a moment, wait a moment, do you remember that ‘golden’ rule about being truthful? If you have too many excuses it means that you don’t have any real ones.

OK, so maybe we should establish what is it that I actually stole?

Your Honor, it was like this: for many months, each day and throughout half of the night I designed, tested, polished, perfected and played my newest game. Sir, you might have heard of it, its the one taking place in a space station with space commandos, two alien races and a bunch of weird scientists.

At some point my work overlapped with another one, a certain project that really stretched in time. Finally got a green light and had to be finished.

The space themed game is Theseus, and the second project is Mephisto– a new add-on to Neuroshima Hex. I worked on Mephisto together with its author Michał Herda. And so somehow these two projects got mixed up a little and some of the solutions we used in Mephisto found their way into Theseus.

The first being the Quill, a super efficient attack as for Neuroshima. It hit’s anything that’s on the game board, no neighboring or line of sight required. You target a victim and it will surely be hit. The Quill emerges form under the ground and bang! It’s a hit. Mephisto really needed this. It serves as an inner balance tool so that the army won’t be too strong when it is next to enemy’s headquarters nor will it be helpless when it can’t get in range with it. Being a one soldier army forces nonstandard solutions.

Right, so where did this Quill come form? There was this card in Theseus, in the Aliens deck, which allowed attacking even when no Alien’s units were nearby. How does it work? Simple, the walls of a space station are filled with technical nooks, lockers built into the walls and such. Inside them, between cables and other devices all of a sudden an additional Alien jumps out and attacks. This card is called Hidden.

And so the Hidden found its way into Mephisto as Quill. Your honor, I swear this was an accident, I didn’t mean to!

The second shared mechanics solution are the Upgrade tokens.

Theseus is mostly based on upgrading your own cards the ones you were able to introduce into the game during your course of play – this is accomplished by putting upgrade tokens on cards. It can change a seemingly useless card into a raging behemoth capable of instantly winning the whole game. Of course Theseus rookies in their first few games don’t pay much attention to this mechanics, they are more focused on chaotic running about and inflicting some minor damage to their opponents. But when they grow bored with all the silly running tactics they start to look for the second or even the third layer of the game. Ignoring minor damage in favor of higher aspirations they discover the real power of Upgrades. Only then with one precise combo they can knock out any fan of running about. It’s one of many inconspicuous secrets of Theseus.

Coming back to Mephisto. One fighting token for the entire army is a huge threat for the balance of the whole game. If it’s too fast no one will stand a chance. Should it be too slow it won’t stand a chance itself. If it’s too strong it will always win in a hit for hit situation. If it’s too weak it will loose. If it will be too mobile it can escape from any trap set by the opponent. If it will be too stationary it won’t get a chance to get closer to enemy’s headquarters which will remove itself to the far end of the game board from where it will attack with immense fire power.

So what should this token be like, so that everything will work?

Well it should be variable. It’s the player who should decide whether he currently lacks fire power, mobility or speed. When you combine it with the ‘short blanket’ syndrome it provides demanding yet satisfying choices to be made during the game. With the seemingly useless Incubator tokens the player creates something that can equalize his chances and make up for his current shortages. This way Upgrade tokens from Theseus sneaked into Mephisto, of course they were previously modified to fit in with Neuroshima’s mechanics. And so Mephisto became Theseus’ cousin.

Is that all?

Nope. Many more cheeky thefts took place here, both sides. Above I’ve mentioned only two examples.

But… maybe you know about which Theseus’ cards and Mephisto’s (and generally Hex’s) tokens I’m speaking about?

[I am happy to present you guest post by Michał Oracz, author of Neuroshima Hex, Witchcraft and Theseus. This is his first appereance and as far as I know, not the last one!] 

I’m a little bit ashamed of that but I must admit I like to play my own games. Whether it is Neuroshima Hex on my smartphone or with real life opponents. Theseus I can play alone or with another player, three players or even in teams.

Witchcraft is the only game I don’t like to play. Because Witchcraft is unforgiving, a slightest mistake you make may cost you the whole game. The bitter feeling that I get after loosing will not be satisfied merely by saying ‘I had no luck with the tokens’. Unless I play solo – than Witchcraft is as pleasurable game as any other.

The eagerness with which I set up Hex or Theseus is suspicious… even for myself. I sit in front of my PC and struggle with some work that has temporarily burned out my enthusiasm and a whole container of inspiration. Hmm, a short break wouldn’t hurt, right? Maybe, a little bit of java power and a short Theseus/Hex match? I wonder what combos I’d put together this time?

I go the other room, I set up the game playing for both sides and in less then a quarter I’m playing a short game sipping my coffee. I always regret that there is no ‘save’ option in board games, especially if I come up with something nasty, so nasty it won’t probably happen again.

Borgo’s mutants totally immobilized by Hegemony’s troops.

The Scientists who are able to found a complete Space Hospital by the end of the game and in one turn they come back to their initial health level.

A construction that has an overpowered automated defense system that takes down enemy troops with just one shot, blasting them from the surface of the Space Station.

A contraption capable of controlling enemy units so that they behave like puppets, barely alive after a short time while the rest of them slowly drift in the outer space.

That’s why I have these urges to stop what I’m currently doing and spend some quality time with Theseus or Hex.

Can no notice what’s wrong with that?

I do. It’s just that I like to play my own games.

It is very, very, very unprofessional. Extremely unprofessional.

A designer should hate his own games. After hundreds of tests and months of creating he should feel sick whenever he sees his game.

It’s not the case with me. And that’s bad.

I like to play my own games because of one simple thing: I created them for myself. To my own liking.

If I were a professional game designer, I would behave like a pro from the very beginning. I would choose a solid theme that would be to almost everybody’s liking. I’d check how popular are the tags connected with are in the game search engines (Lovecraft and Zombie, my forever beloved motifs that became beloved by everybody else and with their popularity they always come up on the top!). I’d read blogs, forums and keep track of the trends and currently discussed mechanics. I would cruise between the testers I know and ask each one of them for an honest opinion, provided I’d be able to pin them down to a board game, whether they would be complete board game noobs, experienced players, extremely experienced authors or publishers.

If I were a professional game designer… See that’s the problem, in the first place I’m player of my own games.

I don’t start a project by saying ‘Hmm I’d like to create a game in which…’. I start with ‘Damn, I’d really enjoy playing a game in which…’.

As you can see theses are often very egocentric impulses.

In my head I have a collection of my dream games, the problem is that some of them are still only in my head. Although I keep on looking through the thousands of existing games some of my dreamed ones haven’t been yet created. It’s the case with board games, computer games and role playing games and that’s a pity because I’d really like to play them!

This is the only reason for my designing. More often than not I delay my normal work and I struggle with yet another version of my dream games, one of my ideal ones. I remake, correct, switch elements, start everything from the beginning because I know what should wait for me at the end. I’m a player with a very abnormal taste and I look for the perfect game for myself. To be more precise a few specific games. I know exactly what is it that I’d like to play! But there is no simple road leading from this knowledge to a ready-made game, at least I haven’t found it.

Finally the magic moment is upon me: here it is, I did it! I’ve got it! I created a good game, I can put my name on it, I’m 100% sure! It’s good enough! Here Ignacy have a look at it!

What does this mean? Just one simple thing. I forgot myself. I started to think as a pro designer: I prepared a solid product, let’s start the tests, let’s talk with the publisher, everything will change but the first stage is complete. Now it’s time for the other stages. Oh I know how it works, I know all too well. For twelve years we’ve been publishing games from the initial idea to a ready-made box. I took this path many times, through the smallest details, tiniest step in the long process of professional game designing and product preparation.

No. Stop. Not this time. It’s just a moment of weakness. I forgot myself and stopped searching for my perfect game. It will be just another title among thousands being published worldwide without any progress to my one true goal.

And than I-the designer get spanked and go for a sick vacation and the I-gamer come out. Merciless, demanding with an atypical taste. A player looking for a game ideal for himself. The best possible game for himself in a given genre and specified theme. I love retro-fantasy, horror, postapocalypse and most of all the claustrophobic sf horror taking place somewhere in space.

Than I look upon the prototype I’ve created once more. Is it for me? Will I loose myself in it and play without even a short break? Will I never get bored by it? Is there a similar game I’d like to play more than this one?

I picture myself after buying a box with this game inside. I’m a consumer. Player. I open, I read the instructions, I start. With a token or a character. I’m trying to see what can be done. What challenges await me, what limits and possibilities. Is this the real thing? The one I’ve been searching for? Can I really do all that I wanted with it? In it? If not that it needs a remake. It needs to once again land on the designing desk.

Is this a good method?

Should everybody share my gusto it would be. But they don’t.

This is a very bad method for professional game designers.

If I was ever to become a professional game designer I’d change it immediately and threw it into the deepest reaches of some long forgotten void. I would instead close the first stage of the designing process as soon as possible and head on to the next ones because this is where the final product is born.

Meanwhile I create games for myself and I keep searching for those few ones about which I’m sure how they should work and look like.

When I will finally repair, correct and polish these few projects that are being grinded all the time I will than have my perfect games. And I will play them all the time.

 ***

Is that all?

Nope. There is one more thing. I’d like to apologize to you all, my good folks. I lied to you. I totally lied to you. A bloggers privilege, isn’t it?

I’m not an exception among game designers, as I’ve tried to persuade you a moment ago.

Each designer has his own code, own style. Often a very particular style, like the one that music bands sometimes have or like a painter, illustrator or a writer.

Each and every designer creates not for everybody but for the people who share his gusto and expectations as far as games are concerned. At least at the prototype stage.

We all try to make the perfect game, the best one that is in it’s genre. And we all do what we can to accomplish that.

Each one of us prays for the largest possible number of players with the same taste. To become the Family Feud master of this domain, it’s not important what you know, it’s important that you think like the rest. So that when somebody asks you on a street: ‘what does a cow drink?’ you will answer with all confidence: ‘milk!’. Just like the majority.

If by some miracle your taste will be similar to the taste of a large number of players, if the later stages of testing and the publishing compromise will only adjust the game to be even more suitable for the demands of an even greater number of players and the game will be a spectacular success, no designer will cry because of this.

Even thou I’m searching for my ideal games, I wouldn’t cry as well.